I Hate Him
by TsukiShirro
Summary: Why can't she see that I hate him with all my heart?
1. Chapter 1

_Hey guys, this is the first kinda story I've written, so sorry if it's really bad. Obviously the characters do not belong to me. Reviews or criticism would be appreciated, and if you don't like don't read! _

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I hate him; I hate him with all of my heart. Words couldn't even describe the feeling; just the thought of him makes me want to crawl into a hole and die, or even better erase his very existence. The way she talks about him, it makes me sick; she talks about how he could be the best thing that ever happened to her.

What can I do? All I can do is agree, pretend that everything is fine, when actually it kills me inside. Imagine what it feels like to see them together, holding hands, kissing, touching. He doesn't deserve it, that lazy bastard has done nothing, I devote my life to this woman, I would die for her, yet she can see me only as a subordinate, a friend. Nothing more. She doesn't even realize the pain she puts me through, I cannot show the pain in my face, my words, it would only show weakness.

My eye's burn with tears at just the very thought of them together, I can't even sleep at night it's almost torment. Ha, she wouldn't even understand if I told her, she would probably think I was being stupid, she only thinks I dislike him. Humph, it's more than dislike, it's pure hatred. Trust me, if I could, I would rip his head from his very body and burn it, these images like fire non-stop running through my head. I don't even care if it's selfish, I love her with all my heart and nothing can stop me from feeling that. I would give or do anything, just so she could feel the same way.

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_AN : Just a little something i thought of at some silly time in the morning! ^.^_


	2. Chapter 2

I think she's onto me. We were on nothing but a short break between the division training; once again I got my hopes up to high. She invited _him. _What could have been a moment of spending time alone with the person I love most in this world, ruined within an instant. The peaceful walk ruined by loud chatter of scientific discoveries or inventions, I don't even know why Yoruichi would even want to know about this.

I managed to control myself that is until he decided to get Yoruichi's lunch. Caring for her is my duty; it's what I live for. Not only did he get her lunch, he interrupted and spoke over me when I offered to get it for her. Anger swept through my whole body. I don't understand how anybody could be so rude and intimidating; my blood was boiling through my veins. I could do nothing. I had to control myself, but she saw. A momentary slip up. She looked right at me and her usually playful eye's followed me as I moved. I planted my eye's down at my food and didn't dare to look up. I couldn't let her find out, something so simple should not affect anyone this much.

I can't tell her my true feelings, I just can't. I keep them within me, growing and growing, it won't stop. No matter what I do, these feelings won't stop growing. The more they grow, the more painful it becomes.

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AN : _This is what happens when I'm really not in a good mood, all these things just come into my head. I thought i would just create a little something._


	3. Chapter 3

"_So noble, so beautiful and so terrifyingly strong. She was everything I ever wanted to be. I very strongly admired her. No, that feeling was beyond admiration. I worshiped her._"

She's gone, disappeared without a word. I didn't think it could get any worse than it was, but it can. Not only did she say nothing, she left with _him. _She didn't even tell me, no note, no words. I searched everywhere for her, I couldn't sleep. I was devastated to think that she would just leave like that. There are so many rumors going around it's just turning my brain into a huge mess. I don't know what to believe. Somewhere deep within me I believe she'll come back and take me with her. Just a tiny bit of hope.

The other squad member's think I'm stupid, thinking she'll come back. If looks could kill, every one of those squad members would be nothing more than a pile of ash. I've sworn my revenge. All my emotions turned into pure hatred, I can't even smile anymore. Just abandoning the squad, the Gotei thirteen and worst of all betraying my trust and respect is unforgivable. You are nothing but a traitor to me now.

By the time she comes back, she'll see how strong I've become. The new leader of the Onmitsukido and Captain of squad 2. A better leader than she could ever be, faster than she could ever be, stronger than she could ever be. I will surpass her she will die and rot by my own hands!

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AN: _Yeah, this is just about when Yoruichi leaves basically. Reviews and criticism would be appreciated._


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